Fun in the mud.

After work today I decided to head out to find some possible cyclo cross training routes in York, I'd heard rumors about such things around the Uni so rode over in that direction.
It took me right back to the old days of trying to find new things to ride on our BMX's a few years ago. The mix of a little bit of exploring coupled with riding your bike fast makes me happy. As it happens I found a few bits and pieces including some nice drawn out off road climb or descent (depending on what you wanted to practise) and I think joining it all together could make a tidy 5km loop.

Check list.

Take the Good with the Bad.
Don't take yourself too seriously.
Try not to obsess.
Take your time, and look properly.
Take care of those you like.

Who needs Paris-Roubaix?

Red sky at night, Shepherd's delight

Everyone seems to be obsessed by the approach of Spring. It's true, just the other day I stepped outside on my way to work and realised for the first time since October it wasn't utterly freezing. The sun has been making an appearance of late and everyone starts feeling a little better about themselves. It's a great time of year and a time for action, there's no excuses anymore, you've got to do what you want to do.

.

Funny how being busy and happy makes me so tired.

Edge of the world.

One of those posts...

I made a remedy of diesel and dust. Something I can taste with the things I can trust.

The opening line from a Hot Water Music song and it sums up what I've been doing recently.
I hate it when blogs start with bullshit about why the author hasn't posted for ages, the truth why I have 'blogged' recently is simply because I have been too busy living life to sit and write about it.
I have finished my employment with The Cat Gallery and am currently in a little inbetween period before starting my new job.
Katherine and I had a little break in the Yorkshire Dales at a beautiful holiday cottage this week. A few days spent in almost isolation, no TV, no mobile reception and a lot of time to clear the mind. Now spending a bit of time sorting out cycling matters, such as building a race wheelset and getting my entries in for the early part of the season. I need to step up my mileage now the days are getting longer and hopefully the snow has left us.
My new job feels like the first employment I've ever had that has a future. It is with Cycle Heaven in York, full time and including time both in the workshop and front of house. It feels like its everything I need and more, and I'm looking forward to learning and the new challenges I will face, while proving to my employers I am worth it.
I talked a lot about making 2010 a better year, and now it's becoming obvious that it will be great compared to 2009 I don't want to get carried away with it all. I am focusing on living more day to day. I'm not saying living in a reckless manner, plans are being made for the future but I'm not letting my mind wander to these things at the detriment of the present day.
To finish, something that made me really smile the other day was that right now I have nothing in my life that I don't care for with all my heart. Katherine, family, friends, everything I do and surround myself with is my choice and I'm very happy with it all.

An ending of sorts.

My website is now offline.
I hope in the short time it has been live it was enjoyed but the time has come to move on with more pressing matters. My photography is still going and will be on my Flickr as usual, and I'm sure another web presence isn't that far away.
I'm learning to let go and move on, finally I think I am in control of my destiny and the time for relying on others is gone.

A shock to the system.

The first training ride of 2010 for me this morning. A hard ride, especially when it's close to two months since my last substantial outdoor mileage and I wasn't helped by a visit by 'the man with the hammer', when I was on the run into home. The previous miles had left my legs empty and then suddenly I was spat out the back of the group and barely able to hold the last wheel. A clubmate was also feeling it and slowed down to help me out, virtually towing me all the way home.
Same again next week but hopefully might get round under my own steam.

This too shall pass.

Enjoy the good times because they will end, don't get too obsessed with the bad either it won't last forever.

It seems like the whole world wants to tell me what they're doing this very second, via the medium of Twitter. I never go on the site but somehow can't escape it.
Writing something on the internet doesn't make it more interesting or any more true. For example right now I'm listening to Alkaline Trio, drinking Black Sheep beer and wondering if I've made the right decision.

The world did not get any better for writing that. Think about that the next time you want to tell the world how long it took you to decide what to eat for breakfast.

Step by step.

I now have a new job.

I am in the process of joining no less than two road racing organisations, and fleshing out my racing calendar for the year.

I am finally starting training again.




This year actions are going to speak louder than words.

Good suprises are scary.

It's not like I take much notice of horoscopes in the back of trashy magazines but just recently every single one of them has told me to "go with the flow" and not cling on to old habits just out of routine. As the real world starts to get back going after Christmas and the snow enforced confusion, I had half an eye on starting work again on Monday. This afternoon something came about, which will definitely test my ability to go with the flow. I have worked hard recently but hadn't prepared myself for the phone call that may call me out.
I don't want to think about it all but know I won't be able to focus on anything else till I know exactly whats going on. Two Thousand and Ten is already looking better than last year, full details as always will follow.

Sleeping in other people's beds.

And by this I mean experiencing other people's way of life and culture. We have traveled round various households this festive period and seen how our family and friends live their lives.

Currently we are snowed in at my family home in Bradford. The most snow I think I've ever seen in my life has fallen overnight and this morning, could resist building a snowman, but almost did my back in doing it. Ended up with a creepy six foot fat snowman in the middle of the front garden and have already done the portrait shots.
It's quite peaceful being cut off from the world. We have food, an open fire to keep us warm and rubbish telly to occupy us if the need arises.

Haven't felt the need to do any resolutions for the New Year, don't need to crowd my mind with empty promises when I know actions speak louder than words anyway.

Merry Christmas.

We're taking off for the festive period, hope everyone gets what they deserve.

Things need change.

There are more than a few things I need to change in my life right now.

Firstly, I need a job that feels like it is building to the career I want for the rest of my working life. All I want is to be involved in something real, which makes me push myself to be better.
Stopping complaining all the fucking time, comes a close second, I've always been a worrier but I'm boring myself with all the depressing rubbish I talk. Sorry to those that have been on the receiving end.
Getting rid of the chillblains on my hands it an obvious goal. A combination of working where I do and my faulty circulation mean my hands are continually painful and so prickly and itchy I would consider chopping them off to get some relief.
A general tidy and organise of my few material pocessions would go a long way.

For 2010 I am quietly hoping for the best while expecting the worst. One reason for shedding the negative mindset is it clouds the good things in life. Great times get forgotten easily and opportunities get missed.
A few things I am already looking forward to are; our five year anniversary, seeing Paris-Roubaix in the flesh, racing my bike and solving the problems and challenges life throws up on the way.


Today I am taxi driver for Katherine because of the snow. Driving was a lot easier than thawing out the car this morning but still the back roads were pretty tricky. On my way home couldn't resist getting the car a bit sideways on the ice but quit before I pushed my luck too much.

I want to say more but I know better.

A trip to Bradford is good for the Soul.

I'm not feeling Christmas yet, haven't done my shopping, we don't have a tree and normality is simply on hold because of work.
I did however, have a cracking day out in Bradford watching the National Trophy Cyclo-Cross in Peel Park. It was a day that restored my faith in (some) people and reminded me to have a good time now and again.

Do It.

I just work.

Not much else happening these days. Riding and any sense of fitness is on hold until the New Year when training rides start again, and working weekends means I didn't even realise Friday had happened until Saturday night.

+1

Haircut.
Productive social occasions.
Another opportunity.
Morning coffees.

-1

Waking up every morning not knowing what day it is.
Undeniable sour grapes.
Trying not to get my hopes up again.

Talk proper.

I feel like parts of my life are from a TV show, most likely a soap opera, problem is no one has given me a script.
Whats happening?

Why do you still care?

And why am I angry?

This is my 300th blog post. Sounds like a lot but this thing started on the 13th of February 2 thousand 6, so knocking on the door of 4 years old.

I recently was asked the question 'What is your dream?' and I don't know the answer anymore. I've had a few over the years but not too many that have worked out. I feel like 2009 hasn't treated us too well but it hasn't killed me either. Possibly made me stronger but crushed a bit of my spirit too.
I'm really looking forward to Christmas because this year it means some proper family time and after that it's exciting to think a few things might be changing again.


I'm not giving up this time.